A lone, thriving green tree at dusk.

Art in the Slow Lane

A short(ish) dive into nourishing your inner creator…

And so began the slow and laborious process of rehabilitating the artist in me...

My first steps on this path continued to employ the dynamic of fulfilling goals. I set myself rules to fulfill, or particular techniques to explore. By setting such goals, I could bypass the vague, burdensome, and ever-shifting notion of whether it was ‘good enough’, and instead measure my success by the extent to which I had fulfilled the rules. Inevitably in this process, I created interesting work regardless of the goal.

“There are no such things as creative blocks, we simply dismiss ideas too soon.”

Fast forward to those three piano pieces. By the time I started work on the first one, I appeared to have left behind many of those self-doubts that had plagued me for years. I came to believe there are no such things as creative blocks — we are rarely short of ideas, we simply dismiss them too soon. All ideas, if accepted and worked with, will naturally evolve into something more satisfying to us.

Hands at the piano.
(Not my piano… Nor, in fact, my hands.)

As if gently encouraging a child…

I recognised the vulnerability of my recovering artistic spirit, so I remained mindful of how I was feeling the whole time. Creating in this way felt far more demanding than working to someone else’s brief. As if I was gently encouraging a child, I would observe when I became stressed and needed to stop, even if that was only after half an hour. But likewise, I would also learn to discern when that inner child was being too fickle and might benefit from just staying focused for a little longer.

Person walking through a richly green forest.

The Art Teaches Us

There are many characteristics to this process that nourish me in different ways from working to brief. Whilst working quickly to briefs and deadlines I was able to utilise the depths of myself I had already discovered, art in the slow lane helps me discover depths I was not aware of.

“Your human personal intuition always whispers, it never shouts.”

Steven Spielberg has said that “Sometimes the dream almost whispers…, your human personal intuition always whispers, it never shouts.” It is not about deliberately and meticulously creating a vision, it is about creating the space and conditions in our lives for a vision, (any vision), to arise, letting go of what that will be and how it will happen.

The Next Dream Whispers…

My next dream arose quietly in this same way. It was a matter of one day catching myself thinking about the silent film ‘The Passion of Joan of Arc’ (Dir. Carl T. Dreyer, 1928), which I had seen only once several years ago with a live score by Irene Buckley. Some time later the thought returned and the idea of composing a new score for this film arose. All I did was not dismiss it, and the idea kept coming back to me.

Still from ‘The Passion of Joan of Arc’ (Dir. Carl T. Dreyer, 1928)
‘The Passion of Joan of Arc’

Let it Be…

“There are forces of nature gently moving us all the time, if only we will let them.”

Ultimately, I believe the dynamics I share here are the deeper reality to creation throughout all areas of our lives. It is less about planning or controlling, and more about letting go and trusting. Nowadays there is often a sense that by the time I consciously make a decision, that decision had in fact already been made some time ago.

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Film Composer. Life Muser. Soul Searcher. Occasional musings on creativity, self-development, music, art and film. www.derekkirkup.com

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Derek Kirkup

Film Composer. Life Muser. Soul Searcher. Occasional musings on creativity, self-development, music, art and film. www.derekkirkup.com